The world gets smaller every day at warp speed. With it comes a mix of cultures, ideas, and language. When I’m sitting in a doctor’s office lobby I’ll watch people with language barriers struggle with understanding their illness and treatment. It’s hard enough to take on health issues let alone when you can’t understand the language. We all have our own personal ways of dealing with setbacks regardless of what language we speak – sadness, anger, denial, and in my case shopping. Shopping helped me tackle initial bad news and adapt to changes I wasn’t ready for.
Hospital work gives you direct access to physicians. In 1987 I had a lymph node removed from my neck, so I was waiting for the results assuming it was a cyst. I ran into the pathologist in the hallway and casually asked her for the biopsy results. After she blurted out “You’ve got cancer” and ran away, things went sideways real fast. When Diane came home from teaching I greeted her with the news. Her immediate response was “we need to go shopping.” Some people cry when misfortune hits, Diane shops. At the Pinellas Square Mall she shoved me into a clothing store and said go buy something, so I stumbled around until I found a pair of brown polyester dress pants. The salesman was a big help – he cringed away from the scar on my neck and said, “wow, that’s huge!”
I started calling the pants The Cancer Pants just to be funny. It reminded us of how we dealt with the diagnosis via shopping. I didn’t really like the pants, but I wore them as a badge of honor. After surgery and radiation I lost about 40 pounds, so rather than buy a new wardrobe I had a seamstress alter everything including the Cancer Pants. Well, the world moves on without us knowing it. I eventually grew back into my old self and the fitted clothes. Being cheap, I tried to delay seeing the seamstress as long as possible. Once again I ran into the pathologist in the hallway. While we were chatting she dropped some papers so I bent down to pick them up. The Cancer Pants had enough, not only did they tear a little they burst completely open and unleashed my underwear like a sail from a schooner. My office was way on the other side of the hospital, so I had to crawl out through the loading dock, walk about 200 yards through the parking lot holding a Manila folder behind me, and sneak into Administration to get to my keys.
Life comes at you fast and often with unexpected changes. You can be naive like me and assume your life will be the same until your pants blow wide open in public or you can accept changes gracefully. After all the radiation and chemo I’ve had recently my esophagus has shrunk along with my eating style. I accept completely that the days of wolfing down a 16 oz. Porter house steak are officially over. The same goes for eating fast food; I’m lucky if I can finish breakfast before dinner. My son Dillon pointed out I ironically have a much healthier diet than he can ever remember. With that in mind last week I returned willingly to the Mall to select some better fitting clothes. Most people would pay a King’s ransom to fit back into their High School size; I just want my pants to behave themselves. Slainte.
Oh Pete, somehow you always manage to make a sad moment funny. That was another favorite for sure!! ❤️
Shelley, it’s all about the sofa sharks. Pete
I look forward to your posts. I can relate to your insights into treatment. You are a funny man 🙂
Thanks for reading and commenting. The blog has been helpful to me personally and I have enjoyed hearing from people who tell me it lifts them up. Slainte.
Praying that splitting those new pants open again will be in your very near future. 🍀
Peter, you always make light of complicated situations. It is very refreshing and inspiring! Without you ,and your wisdom and humor , the outlook many of us would share surely would be much more dismal and melancholy! You are a pisser old buddy! Thank you and Slaintè!
Dayton, I think we are cut from the same cloth – growing up in the ADK builds your resilience and humor. Best, Pete
Spandex rues the day
Velcro rues the day
Hey Pete: I often find myself waiting to read your next post. Your life and the way you live it is really a testimony for those who are currently going through any serious life threatening health care issues….. and also will serve as a testimony for anyone who may need an uplifting in the future. I’ve enjoyed knowing you all these years going way back when you were in St Pete, then when we were shaking things up running our hospitals in Winter Park and Kissimmee, the Saint Patty’s Day parties and now at least getting to read your uplifting (an humorous) posts. I do think that we have one thing in common and that is our faith in God and that certainly serves as a solid foundation for addressing these life issues. Say Hi to Diane from Sandy and me.
Mark, I too think about all the time we spent working together; there’s plenty of stories for the blog posts, but I’d probably get sued. Like you, I do rely on Faith to get me through tough spots. I have no problem saying that in public even though people get criticized for it. That has always been the case and always will be, so ultimately it’s a personal choice. Let’s try to get together some time soon. Give my best to Sandy. Pete
Good post Pete. I’m sharing these with family and friends going through similar times.
Brown and polyester? You weren’t suffering enough?
Slainte, here’s to many more posts
Chris, the teal pants just didn’t fit the moment. Pete
One of my grandma’s favorite saying was “Shop till ya Drop!” When the going gets tough, the tough go shopping 🛍️ Sometimes you need new threads 🧵 Shop on!!! Stay well!!!
PS maybe fancy pants are in your future!
Fran, I don’t see polyester too much in my future. Pete
Pete,
Enjoyed today’s post. Prayers are with you!
Jane, thanks for being an avid reader! Pete
I always look forward to reading your perspective on things Pete! Very thoughtful and down to earth, unlike many things we see/read these days! It’s refreshing and inspiring!
Terry, great to hear from you and I’m glad you like the blogs! Best, Pete
I always look forward to reading your perspective on things Pete! Very thoughtful and down to earth, unlike many things we see/read these days! It’s refreshing and inspiring!
Pete… you are always inspiring. The attitude you have is one of kind. Shop till you drop! Slainte 🙏🏻🍀
Mary, I just don’t shop for clothes much so being in the mall was a little weird. I don’t know how people get into narrow legged jeans. Pete
I am reading this on my one second of downtime from middle schoolers….and you’ve got me crying (in the good way). For God”s sake…keep shopping! Nobody wants to see that shit. There is cheap and then there is crazy. Just be cheap. Thank God Diane knocked some sense into you! Much love Mr. Pete. Slainte! 🍀❤️🪳
Elisa, Diane knocking sense into me is a full time job no one else wants. Pete
And that makes it beautiful. You are blessed Mr. Pete. 💕
And that makes it beautiful. You are blessed Mr. Pete. 💕
Great one Pete
Thanks William!
You are one very special person Mr Lawson and so proud to be able to call you my friend. You never fail to make me smile, thank you.
Nothing funnier than someone’s pants splitting open in public, right?
Your words and photos are always incredibly linked…. unleashed my underwear like a sail from a schooner. 😃. You have many talents! As I reflect on great mentors in my healthcare executive career, you’re up there. Thanks Pete.
Another great one Pete! I too can only eat smaller portions. Not the way I wanted to lose weight either.
Scott, supposedly smaller portions are good for you; but I’ve not turned that corner just yet. Pete
This is a great one Pete – keep ‘em coming!
Thanks Connor – I’m sure you’re rooting for the Eagles in the Super Bowl 🙂